Requirement ..

I  am looking for a Bank which can perform Two things for me :

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Give me a Loan, & then Leave me aLone !! 

Girl Vs Boy Texting ....

A boy sends a text

Boy : Hey

Girl (to herslf): OMG..he just txtd me..I wondr wat he wants..maybe he just wants to talk..or maybe he's mad at me, but all he said was hey.. I should jst answer him, dnt wnt to keep him waitin..well maybe I'll wait another 3 minutes so he thinks I m busy..no, that's too obvious. Could this mean he's into me? Or is  he just bored? Either way is fine, I mean I don't care if he likes me back. Who said that I even liked him?
huh.. I'm gonna text back now.
Should I reply hi or hey. Hey with 3 y's? No thats stupid. 2 y's work.
He wont know if I did it on purpose or if it was accidental.
Ok! I got this. Breathe in, breathe out.

Girl: Heyy !!!

Boy: plz mark my attendance at college!!!

Why men should not be agony aunts

A very good example exemplifying the fact that men should not try hands at being agony aunts.

Dear Dave, I left home for work yesterday and after only driving a mile down the road, my car stalled and then would not start, I had to walk all the way back home only to find my husband in bed with our 19 year old babysitter, they announced that they had been having an affair, it had been going on 2 years and that they were deeply in love. I am completely heart broken, can you help me ? I am desperate,

yours sincerely
 Tracy


And the reply ---> 
 

Dear Tracy, the most common case for vehicle breakdown in the first few miles is dirt in the fuel lines, if this is not the cause it usually the alternator, hope this helps,

Dave.

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 No comments :P

That Rahul !!

First things first. I am no follower or fan of Rahul Gandhi . Despite the fact that he shares the same first name as mine, i have never really taken interest in knowing more about this "Rahul". However, i recently came across this site. I can't marvell at the fact that it does give a complete list of all the things Rahul Gandhi has genuinely done for India, that am aware of !! . Whatz more interesting, is  that it is updated frequently enough to capture all the work on day to-day basis .... worth a watch for all Rahul Gandhi bashers !!!! 

No title !!

Every now and then i get into this weird mood where suddenly the most phaltu joke gives immense pleasure. So have decided to blog few "worst jokes ever" till i remain in this mood :p. So here is one of such jokes. Its a old one, but still funny.



Woman is like fruit...
Every fruit has its own taste, sweetness and colour...

The problem with men is,
They love fruit salad. ;)

Noida Moments

Yet another visit courtesy Samsung. This was an aberrant one though. Absolutely out of blue. But still ...

So morning 5:50 am  .. I ( of all the lazy people  in the world ) actually got ready in nick of time to be couriered  to the Airport. My parents were so proud of me to see me get up and get ready so early in the morning ;) . I myself can't trace the last time i did this :-D. However, more fun was awaiting. The radio cab wala simply didn't return to my calls and no one was in sight for my pick up:(. TENSION Tension Tension. After wasting some time at society's gate  ( well, not exactly wasting, i got to know the name of the watchman of our society ) i decided that enough of waiting business. I picked up my BMW ( :-D ) and hurried to the airport. I applied all my mathematis calculation skills to frantically calculate my intended average speed so as to reach airport on time !! .. Precise calculation coupled with schumacher style driving made me land at airport just in time ( Phew !! )

AirIndia doesn't show many changes since the last time i travel-led ( around 5 yrs back i guess ) with it. Celotaped edges, aircraft engine making noise such that even deaf people can hear it humming, aunties asking with a smile " would you like tea or coffee ?" .. everything is still the same :p ..

Cut to Noida:
   The first thing i felt on landing in Noida was the extreme heat. I should suggest my company to use Noida for the temparature controlled testing. 37 degree at 10 am is a total No No !! ..Even AC vehicle was falling short to give any respite. .. Bad Bad weather .. Note to self: Never ever do a domestic travel without a weather check. Be atleast mentally prepared.

Food:
   What is it with samsung office food and me ? Be it Korea or here, Samsung office food totally sucks. I was told that food is better than the one served during my short visit. I think i should let samsung know that am now on dieting and i don't eat much :P, so they should continue serving good food we me around :p.

This was a very short trip (thank god ), where i had to come back the same day. The initial 4 hours were spent so lazily that i could have defeated a snail in a race. But the last 1 hour compensated for the whole day !! .. Samsung employees finally got a glimse of speed of light by the way i was moving around to get things done !! . ..

Is that a airplane in the office ? ... or a bird in the office ? .. No No its Rahul !! , who just walked by to another workspace :-D ( the thoughts of employees around :p )

Anyways, the cherry on the cake for this trip ( and also my fav dialogue after a long time ) is the statement made by the taxi driver once we entered Noida from Delhi : Uttar Pradesh ke log utle hote hai - frustrated driver on watching a bus parked in the centre of the road which led to traffic :P


Reached home in one piece. An eventful day comes to end :)

Timepass

Had again forgotten that this part of my life exists. So another umpteenth time attempt to revive this section.

Beat this conversion !! Does the below sentence ring any bells ?

"soft flower hiding alone alcohol raised up came !! "

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chikni chameli chupke akeli pavva chaddha ke aayi !!



* bangs head * !!!

Don 2

After the poor debacle of RA.One, SRK owes one to Farhan Akhtar now. SRK is all stylish, sleek and super suave. This is a really good way for people to erase the traumatic memory of RA.One. Honestly.

SRK's first Don was marked to be a remake of the old classic page by page ( however ,the climax scene actually reversed the whole thing, but still ). This movie had freedom of coming out of its image of being a remake and it does justice to same. The story is pretty simple actually. Continuing from where it ends in part 1, Don ( SRK ) is now seen in Thailand. Opening scene has some fighting scenes which is just part of movie to make an entry of our hero (villian). The weird hairdo of SRK is quite funny to look at. He has all mean look btw. Don surrenders himself to Police, gets to meet his old foe Vardhan ( Boman Irani ). They plan an escape from the jail. Next up, they plot the burglary of the century. Twists and turns throughout the movie, ensure that there are not many boring scenes.

Movie has Priyanka Chopra ( Roma, who now is a police officer) and Om Puri ( Malik ) from the previous part. New entrants worth mentioning are Kunal Kapoor ( nice change i would say ) and Lara Dutta ( Replaces isha koppikar, but has even less and meaningless role. Infact her role didn't even have any oomph factor baring the one song. Waste !! )

Mission impossible , ocean's eleven, die hard, matrix -- Movies from where stills are "inspired" from in the movie. Some action scenes are really good. Car chase between SRK and Priyanka is one of them. Add to these some cheesy comments by SRK throughout the movie. and you do get an entertainment package there.

Performance wise, Its actually SRK all the way. Even a heavy star cast like Boman Irani, PC, Kunal Kapoor, Om Puri is no match to presence of SRK. In fact, hardly any scenes in movie, where SRK is not part of it. SRK has done his best to give 100% to glorify the negative role.

A perfect masala movie. SRK lovers would obviously watch it. SRK bashers, still watch the movie, worth watching i say !!

Mega reviews

I watched a couple of few movies lately and so a review toh banta hai yaar !! .. toh here it goes

I am Kalam :
Such a nice move this was. Initially i thought that this would be some children movie, but this turned out to be movie that has emotions and drama to touch heart of anyone and everyone.
The story revolves around a rajasthani boy named chottu (performed by Harsh Mayar ) who is inspired by the life of India's former president APJ Abdul Kalam , and has an undying urge to read and learn new things.

Chhotu is an intelligent boy from a poor family in Rajasthan. Born into poverty, his mother makes him work at a roadside dhaba owned by Bhati ( Gulshan Grower ). Chottu is quick to learn the tricks and languages as the dhaba is visited by many tourists. One day Chhotu watches President Dr. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam on television and it inspires him so much that he changes his name to Kalam.

The boy brings smile to your face every time he comes on the screen. The movie showcases the problem of lack of education in rural india pretty well. It makes a point in a very good way. 5 stars for this movie !!

Zindagi Mille Na Doobara: Another good movie. Starcast itself ( read Katrina ) was enough reason to watch this one. Comparison with DCH was obvious. Story is about 3 friends who go out on a trip to relive their lives and end up facing one or other "fears" in their life. The movie is nicely connected with events in their life. Farhan's character has some good funny lines. Abhay Deol proves once again why he is such an underrated actor. He is one actor with awesome talent. Hrithik is also good. Kaifu "looks" good :-D .. guess she does justice to her role. Oh, and spain is now right up in the to -visit countries list :)


Silence of Lambs :
This was on my to watch for a long time. Finally watched it. Superb !! ..


I hate luv Storys:
Why did i watch this movie ??. Sonam, please teach her to act !!. Just looking good ain't gonna work. We already have Kaifu for that and she is done just good. I guess, this was the only reason why i started watching this movie. Note to self .. Do not judge a movie from a single song ;)

Singham :
Paisa vasool movie. Keep your head out and watch this movie. nahi tar tumchi pan sataknar ;).
Good cop thrown in land of goons where rule are made and broken to suit the goon. Cop goes berserk and decides to teach the goon a taste of its own medicine. Mediocre story, but still, movie has the entertainment tag attached with it. Marathi dialogues by Ajay are so funny. And the gravity defying action stunts are must watch. The villian too has some catchy dialogues. Dabanng had bound to have some imitation and guess Singham just started the series.


Phew !! .. I guess i should watch some hollywood movies now :-D