For the starters, i am learning to drive a four-wheeler ( bullock-carts / modified rickshaw / tum tum and others are next on the list ;) ). Now being an inquisitive engg. myself, i always thought i ask a lot of questions. And when in mood, i can ask the most stupidest question ever. However, today this long lasting myth got broken and now the fact is that i at-least know one person who asks more irrelevant questions that i can think of. So here it goes ..
Morning 7:00 am, i reach the driving class destination, shivering. Its more cold than i had anticipated and should have worn that sweater instead of trying to look cool. There was this petite young lass. I guess, she was a product engg. from infosys because at-least her bag had those words imbibed on them. 7:10 , she broke the eternal silence and asked .. isn't it cold ?. I was like .. no ..its damn hot here ..feel like going for a swim .I just smiled and reminded her that this is the cold season. Immediately the next question was, how late is this man today. Though she had asked a right thing, i didn't reply back ( simple smile !!).
Finally 7:15, the instructor came. I get to drive first. Its been 7 days that i am driving now. I haven't learnt a great deal yet, but have improved a hell lot !! . Right from the first day , wherein i removed my hands from the steering wheel on seeing a truck coming from opposite side , i guess am at pretty good situation. Straight line drive is comfortable while side turns / U -turns still need assistance.
Right, so there i was completing my drive and driving cautiously on a small slope enjoying the serene morning and the calm and quite surrounding that pune showers on u these days .But that was the end ( of the thought and the calmness). What started next was a whole round of 20 minutes of firing of questions at point blank range.
Am driving, and up pops the question:
She : Sir slope pe konse gear pe gadi chalate hai ?
Instructor (I) : Stares. Thinks that he needs to give sum answer. And mutters "second".
She: Accha, matlab gadi uppar le jate samay bhi second aur neeche aate samay bhi second ?
I: madam, woh aapke speed ke hisab pe hota hai.
Wow... does she always drive with the rule books ?? , drive at this speed on this lane only !! ..
Next i was asked to take a U-turn. Not being good at it, i was a bit nervous and wanted to get over with it as soon as possible. But the champion lady had other thoughts in her mind.
Up pops the question, "sir mujhe aapne U-turn kyun nahi sikhaya ??"
For a moment i felt telling her .. le bhai .. yeah le steering, maar de U-turn tu hi. But sanity was restored and i completed my round of training quite comfortably.
Next it was her chance, and boy ..she clocked more questions than the wheels did the revolutions.
S: Sir clutch dabau ?
I: Aap ka pehle din thode hai Jo yeah basic questions puch rahe ho...
S: Nahi sir, mujhe darr lagta hai..
I: chalo ..
She accelerates more instead of leaving the clutch, hence the car vibrates instead of going ahead.
S: Sir, car main kuch kharabi hai ?? ( What the hell ??)
I: clutch chodo .. accelerate mat karo
S: ohh ..
The moment she gets car moving:
S: Sir second gear?
I: Ruko.
Just when the instructor signals for gear change:
S: Sir sab gears dalu ek ek karke ?
I: huh
S: Sir, woh dusre sir ne aisse hi sikhaya (The other instructor's job is gone i guess now).
After few moments.
S: Kitne thandi hai na?
S: Sir, 4th gear pe kitna speed hona chahiye ( Thatz a valid question)
S: Sir, gadi control main nahi rehti..
While taking a sharp turn,
I: Slow , clutch, third , release clutch, clutch, second.
S: Sir, directly second gear main dal du ??
By this time , i was actually enjoying the whole thing. There was a bus stop ahead, with few people standing there. While going near to that part of the road,the car moved a bit towards the stop. Instead of getting the vehicle back in line, she mumbled out , logon ko laggega main unhe pick up karne aa rahi huin !! .... killer statement.
I must confess,the lady has set new standards in my books when it comes to blabbering and asking useless questions. Looking forward to drive with her the next time around ;)
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